Saturday, June 02, 2007

Sudden Death of a Beloved Friend

" Hi Darling, all is beautiful in the land of Robert Graves.........it's perfect here, take care and see you soon xxx"

This is the message on a post card received today. But D died 2 days ago in Majorca. He was in his mid fifties. He had eaten a good lunch, had drunk a glass of fine wine. Went to sleep in an armchair, and didn't wake up.

His career had been in the music business, at one time he worked for Linda and Paul McCartney, and Warner Bros. He was Freddie Mercury's first male love.

He was my best friend, he had masses of friends who loved him. We are all speaking to each other, all shocked all devastated. He loved us all.
He was a wonderful cook and his greatest pleasure was feeding us.

He made a special birthday lunch for me every year.. made Christmas cakes for his friends each year. I still have a bottle of sloe vodka he made last year.

Rosie only allowed him to stroke and pet her. She's never let my son touch her.

He'd had major heart surgery in his late thirties, so his stressful worklife was
curtailed.

He was about 50% of my life. That has has gone forever.

My son loved him. I hated him going away. He was the first person I spoke to on my mobile 'phone after my sudden exit from The Sunday Times, he lived near Wapping and we went for celebratory lunch, I didn't quite know whether to laugh or cry.

He died with a little smile on his face, and all of his friends male and female are weeping.

I am utterly heartbroken, and don't know how this terrible emptiness and grief will ever leave me.

Comments on "Sudden Death of a Beloved Friend"

 

Blogger Span Ows said ... (Saturday, June 02, 2007 6:56:00 PM) : 

Hello Rupe, very sorry to hear of your grief; he sounds a wonderful fellow. However it seems he died happy and with lots of friends who, from what you write, seemed to love him as much as you did and as much as he loved you all. Seems a trite thing to say but he would probably not want you to grieve; also, the fact that you are speaking with all the other friends will help lessen the blow. The emptiness will pass but until then think about the smile on his face and the fact that he died happy and loved, that should help you.

 

Blogger Rupe said ... (Sunday, June 03, 2007 3:27:00 PM) : 

Thank you Ows. Of course you write
such good sense.

 

Blogger Curmy said ... (Sunday, June 03, 2007 8:35:00 PM) : 

Rupe, I'm so sorry you've lost such a good friend, I can't think of anything comforting to say , only to echo Span's words.

 

Blogger Ump said ... (Thursday, June 07, 2007 1:59:00 PM) : 

So sorry Rupe . :-(

x.

 

Blogger Rupe said ... (Thursday, June 07, 2007 2:10:00 PM) : 

thanks all. x

 

Blogger Name Witheld said ... (Sunday, June 10, 2007 10:16:00 PM) : 

Really sorry to hear of your loss, Rupe. I don't know what to say that hasn't already been said but I think you can be grateful that you knew such a great bloke. Most of us never get to anyone quite like that.

 

Blogger Rupe said ... (Sunday, June 10, 2007 10:35:00 PM) : 

thanks LPJ, life is just horrible at the moment.

It was such a shock, it's difficult to be rational or sensible.

So kind of people to write, x

 

Blogger Gavin Corder said ... (Monday, June 11, 2007 2:03:00 AM) : 

Best way to go Rupe! I don't want to linger on palliative care and I bet you don't either!

Chin up! Remember him well when you eat, drink and be merry!

 

Blogger Linda Mason said ... (Monday, June 11, 2007 10:15:00 PM) : 

I am so sorry to read this Rupe. To lose a beloved friend is heartbreaking. You will miss him and no doubt think of him often seeing as he played such a big part in your life. In that way he will continue to live. In your heart and mind he is still and always will be, alive.

He sounds like the sort of a person who would love everyone to have a riotous party at his wake and not to be mournful. He died the sort of death that most of us would want; happy and peaceful following a lovely lunch.

Big hugs to you Rupe.

xx

 

Blogger Mister Frost said ... (Tuesday, June 12, 2007 1:08:00 AM) : 

"And even in our sleep,
pain which cannot forget
falls drop by drop upon the heart, until, in our own despair,
against our will, comes wisdom through the awful grace of God."

- Aeschylus

My deepest sympathies Rupe.

 

Anonymous Anonymous said ... (Sunday, June 17, 2007 11:19:00 PM) : 

How young and how sad.

As Span and Mags (and others) have pointed out - how peaceful though too.

I remember when I was a little girl my grandmother saying to me that HER grandmother died in her sleep and how "peaceful" that was.

I thought "what is she going on about?" but now that I'm no longer 10 years old I understand what she meant.

Your friend, Rupe was young to die - but far better he die a peaceful and unexpected death (however horrible that is) than a long and protracted painful one.

My father died suddenly at the age of 65. Just sitting in an armchair with the latest copy of the Good Pub Guide in his lap. No illness or anything - just died. Almighty shock to my mother of course.

And your friend's early death is a shock to you and all who knew him.

Sympathies to you.

 

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